Who knew?
by gilboob
Summary: When someone said count your blessings now  'Fore they're long gone  I guess I just didn't know how  I was all wrong... Song-fic for "Who knew?" by P!nk.  Warnings:slight mentions of sex, alcohol, one sided romance, general angst


A/N: If any of you guys that are reading this are as a big a shipper of Germancest as I am, then the thought of this might make you cry, its better if you listen to the song too

Summary: Song fic for PrussiaxGermany with the song Who Knew by P!nk

Warning: Character death, angst, depression, slight violence, one sided romance, slight mentions of sex but nothing specific

You guys might need some tissues.../sniffs. Now let's see if I can write this whole thing through without crying

Who Knew?

_You took my hand, you showed me how_

_You promised me you'd be around_

_Uh huh, that's right_

The little bundle moved slightly, betraying the presence of something, someone, inside its warm cocoon. Gilbert peeked inside, smiling radiantly as he witnessed his new baby brother. Being about five or six years old, he didn't normally care for babies, they were loud, messy, and cried when he tried to play swords with them. But this one, this one was all his, his to take care for and raise as his own little private soldier.

His finger sneaked inside the folds of the blanket, petting the soft skin of the rosy cheek slowly, trying not to wake him up. Instead, the baby did, and his fist uncurled, wrapping unconsciously around Gilbert's forefinger.

"Fritz, I get to keep him, right?" he asked, using his other hand to clear away the sunshine yellow hair, gazing into the baby's blue eyes.

"Of course, I didn't bring him here just for fun. He is your little brother now, and you must take care of him while he grows up."

"Kleiner bruder..." Gil repeated, "you're my kleiner bruder, and I will always protect you."

_I took your words and I believed_

_In everything you said to me_

_Yeah huh, that's right_

"Bruder!"

"Yes, Ludwig?" Gilbert asked, turning away from the other men in the line.

"Where are you going?" The child waddled up to his brother, grasping his hand tightly in his own smaller one. "Are you going to another battle again?"

"Unfortunately little one, I am. But," he scooped Ludwig up into his arms, "I promise I will come back. I will return from each one of them as long as I have you to protect." Ludwig still wasn't convinced. Tears were falling slowly down his face, and he clung tightly to his brother.

"How about I give you this?" Something had fallen over Ludwig's head, and when he removed himself, he found that it was Gilbert's Iron Cross necklace. He always wore it everywhere, never took it off, never even let him touch it before now. "If you're ever worried about me, or miss me, or want to talk to me when I'm not here, just hold it tightly. I'll feel it, and I'll know to come home extra fast, okay?"

"Okay, bruder, I believe you." They shared a tender Eskimo kiss for a few seconds, each feeling warmth swell up in his stomach, before Ludwig was set back down on the ground. When Gilbert's back was turned as he was leaving, he took the cross up to his lips and kissed it, for extra luck.

"Come home soon, bruder."

_If someone said three years from now_

_You'd be long gone_

_I'd stand up and punch them out_

_Cause they're all wrong_

_I know better_

_Cause you said forever_

_And ever, who knew?_

Ludwig sat nervously, twiddling his thumbs and idling away the time until Gilbert came home. A maid approached him, telling him that she thought it was best that he go to bed, he wasn't coming back tonight, and maybe not ever. Just as he is about to dismiss her, the double doors flew open, revealing the only person he really cared about, covered in bloody rags and scars and bleeding cuts. A weak smile is thrown Ludwig's way before he collapsed in a heap on the marble floor, breathing labored and very shallow.

Without any words, Ludwig ran over to him, kneeling by his side and cradling his head in his lap, wiping away the blood pooling at his neck. "Gilbert...what happened to you?" he whispered, scanning his body for any more injuries.

"Simple. I lost a battle." Gilbert coughed loudly, some blood spattering on the floor. Whispers were heard behind them.

"He will lose more than a battle, maybe his life soon enough. And the child...the child will lose the only one that he cares for." The child whipped around, tears brimming in his eyes, ready to challenge the one that spoke, but Gilbert pulled him back.

"Do not punish them, little one. They are correct, and you must remember that I may not come back from another battle, whenever that may be." He coughed into his hand as Ludwig sobbed defeatedly over his body, hugging him close.

_Remember when we were such fools_

_And so convinced and just too cool_

_Oh no, no no_

Laughter rang out from the bar, revealing to everyone how happy the two Germans were. Before, they had gone out after victories in war, or other work related topics just to get things off their minds, but this was purely for fun and relaxation. They downed the dregs of their beer and ordered more, intoxication never an issue. They sat reminiscing for hours, glasses piling up on the bar table, until one stood straight and stretched. He dragged the other up, leaning on him lazily and laughing uncontrollably.

"Gil...shut up, will you?" Ludwig mumbled, holding his throbbing head. They stumbled down the sidewalk, one brother laughing, the other scowling. Suddenly, Ludwig was picked up and twirled around. He didn't know Gilbert had that much strength in him.

"Ha ha ha! L-Luddy!" Geez, he was _sooo _drunk.

"What is it, Gil? And put me down, for Gott's sake."

"But whyyyy?" he whined, flopping down onto a door stoop, head knocking back against the door. "Can't I spend some time with my kleiner bruder?"

"You can, but no picking me up this time!"

"Fine fine, party pooper" he grumbled, leaning his head down on Ludwig when he sat next to him. They both sat, Gilbert still laughing and eying the woman's breasts and bottoms as they walked past, Ludwig trying not to blush too much as he did so. Suddenly, he was kissed on the cheek, sloppily, no doubt.

"Getting a bit jealous there, bruder?" Gilbert purred in his ear, mussing up his slicked back hair. "Can't stand to see that someone might take me away from you, huh?"

"No, it's the fact that you can ogle a female with _no_ sense of dignity at all, have no shame about it, and _still_ don't get hit for it afterward."

"Kesese~ You're still adorable, West." He leaned back, hands folded behind his head on the hard concrete, eyes closed.

The other German looked over, and paused. The way the lamplight hit his brothers skin, making it look even more bleached, and the way the wind blew his hair made him look even more stunning. He didn't have a care in the world, instead of like Ludwig. He never seemed to have much time for looking at his brother, but he did now, and he took advantage of it.

The way his throat curved and his Adam's apple bobbed as he breathed deeply, the slight arch on the bridge of his nose that he always denied (because having a less than perfect and straight nose was wayyyy too unawesome), the tiniest strain of the cotton in his shirt betraying how muscular he really was, even though he didn't look it.

That was when Ludwig fell in love, for the first time in his life.

_I wish I could touch you again_

_I wish I could still call you a friend_

_I'd give anything_

The bright sunlight didn't reflect what everyone felt in their hearts, standing at the casket being lowered six feet under. It was a small ceremony, only the G8 and some others came, Hungary, Austria, Spain, and even Romano. He decided not to whine about it though, you don't complain about going to someone's funeral, even though you didn't like the guy. No one spoke, no one coughed, sneezed, and barely breathed during the ritual. Only one person cried, and it was Liechtenstein. She was a child, and anything upset her. The one person they expected to cry, didn't, he wasn't even there.

He stood lonely while everyone left, murmuring unhelpful words of comfort to him, some not even bothering lest he snap. Once they were all gone, the tent pulled down, and the flag removed, folded, and in his arms, he did his best not to break down. To no one's surprise, it didn't work.

With a strangled sob, the man collapsed onto his knees, tears falling down his face as he screamed his sorrow to the world. The Prussian flag fell to the ground, becoming stained with mud as he kicked and rubbed it in the dirt.

_ "Why did you leave me! Why did you leave me alone!" _he screamed. Had this been how Prussia had felt when Fritz died? Like his heart was being burned while it was still beating? His soul was being torn apart, everything he had lived for, being placed into the ground, never to tell him how proud he was of him, or how much he loved him.

_Take me! Take me instead of him! Bring him back!_

Never would he hear that annoying laugh of his, or the snores rolling up from the basement, wishing he could hear them next to him as he slept instead. No, it was much worse.

He had lost the one thing in the world that had made him smile.

_When someone said count your blessings now_

_'Fore they're long gone_

_I guess I just didn't know how_

_I was all wrong_

_But they knew better_

_Still you said forever and ever_

_Who knew?_

"He is becoming weaker. I know you have noticed, Ludwig."

"Please, Roderich. Not now, anything but now."

"Then when? When will you see that he is dying?"

"He is not dying!"

"He is, and you are just too stubborn to see it. You should spend some time with him, before he disappears."

"He promised me."

"Excuse me?"

"He promised me he'd stay with me forever. He never lies."

"Not even he can promise something like that."

_I'll keep you locked in my head_

_Until we meet again_

_Until we, until we meet again_

_And I won't forget you my friend_

_What happened?_

"B-bruder...you're not...you're not leaving me."

"Who said I'd leave you?" The albino whispered, cradling his brothers face in his hand, moving it slowly down to hold his Iron Cross.

"Roderich, Elizabeta, everyone said you're dying." Ludwig averted his eyes, murmuring the words.

"Tch, what do they know?"

"A lot, actually." His words were still soft in volume, but hard in tone, betraying all of his feelings in a few words. Gilbert noticed, and tried his best not to get dizzy as he sat up in his bed. He smirked.

"So, you actually care about your big brother?"

"Was? I've always cared about you." Ludwig frowned. What was he talking about?

Gilbert coughed a bit. "You never seemed to have time for me when you grew up. I remember when you were so tiny and you'd hold onto my cape when I had to go back into war. And you'd cry when there were thunderstorms, and you'd run into my room."

Ludwig didn't say anything about the teasing, content on letting Gilbert finish while he still had time. The reminiscing went on for a few minutes, before Gilbert fell into a coughing fit. Ludwig sighed sadly, laying Gilbert back onto the pillows and wiping his forehead free of sweat.

"Gott...I didn't know it would be this easy. Just disappearing is painless." He gave a wry laugh, mocking himself in his pitiful state. Ludwig sat silent and motionless, dreading the moment when his world would come crashing down. They sat silent for a while, until Gilbert reached out and held his baby brother's hand, one minute until midnight.

"Luddy, I'm sorry this had to happen. It's all the fucking Allies fault."

"No, it's not their fault. It's mine. They thought you were a bad influence on me as a country."

"Well I am! I'm rubbing some of my awesome off on you, that's why!" Ludwig couldn't help but chuckle, watching as his brother's red eyes closed slowly. The picture in his head was beautiful, if morbid. His brother, preserved like a glass doll, no more scars to mar his perfect complexion. No words were exchanged when it happened, only a soft breath escaping like a ghost from Prussia's lips, telling him he was really gone.

A crystalline tear fell to the ground to the tune of a soft, "Auf wiedersehen."

_If someone said three years from now_

_You'd be long gone_

_I'd stand up and punch them out_

_Cause they're all wrong_

"No, you bloody fool, we cannot send you to Pluto dressed as Superman!"

"But why not? It'd be so totally cool!"

"First of all, mon cher, Pluto isn't a planet anymore!"

"If it's not a planet, we can just blow it up, da?"

Each person in the room stared at Russia, the last one giving him a hard glare. _Sadistic bastard_, Germany thought, tapping his stack of papers a little too hard on the table. If it weren't for the fact that he acted so innocently all the time, when he really loved hurting people, and that he had taken his brother away and refused to let him visit, he thought they might actually get along.

Those notions ended when the Allies agreed to hand Prussia over to him. They also ended when a letter arrived at his house a week after he was sent there, the words revealing how horrible life was at Ivan's house. It was only when he confronted the older nation that his letters arrived already torn open, obviously searched and examined.

The stern silence was broken by a loud bang, and everyone turned around, gazing in awe at the person standing in the doorway.

"Uh, M-mister Russia, I t-tried to stop him, but he-". Lithuania was cut off, another thudding echoing around the room.

"Oi, West, I'm home." A raspy voice called out quietly, the body laying exhausted on the floor. It took a total of two seconds for Germany to rush to his aid, stooping low and gathering his brother up in his arms, examining the bruises and marks littering his body.

"Gilbert...what happened?" he whispered, moving some hair out of the way to look at a black eye.

"What does it look like happened? I got out, escaped from that fuckin' commie's house... It took a while, the chains were kinda tight." Russia glared, giving off a low growl no one could hear. "I threw up on them. You know, stomach acid is amazing..."

He trailed off, eyes falling shut and his breathing shallower than before. Germany sat there, in the middle of everything, trying to comprehend what was happening...His brother escaped from Russia, he was here! But he was also very sick, looking close to passing out from exhaustion, which made Germany even more panicky.

"Hey, Prussia!" came that annoying, nagging voice from the American. "You okay? You look like you're going to die or som-"

"Get away from him!"

"Woah, dude, chill out, I was just..."

"I said get away!" Germany stood up, fists clenched to defend his wounded sibling, teeth grinding in unadulterated rage. He would kill anyone who dared get close to him other than himself, helpful or not.

"Calm down West! Jeez, you're like an animal sometimes..." Gilbert gave a wheezy laugh, coughing again. Ivan stepped forward, pipe in hand, anger gleaming in his eyes. Surprisingly, Arthur stopped him, hand outstretched across his large chest.

"You touch him, you bloody arsehole, and I will personally see to it that there will be no sun in your Godforsaken country for the rest of your insignificant life." Russia brushed the hand away, only to have his way impeded by Alfred, Francis, Italy, Japan, Arthur, Canada, Romano, Spain.

Germany nodded slightly in thanks to them, picking up his unconscious brother and walking out.

_And that last kiss I'll cherish  
>Until we meet again<br>And time makes it harder  
>I wish I could remember <em>

_But I keep your memory  
>You visit me in my sleep<br>My darling, who knew? _

"Gilbert...I-I'm..."

"Y-yeah, me too..." They climaxed together, and Gilbert fell, panting deeply into the pillows. Ludwig rolled over and stared., getting a quick but deep kiss in return.

"What was that for?" Germany asked, a bit shocked but pleased, touching his lips tenderly.

"Usually people kiss or cuddle after sex. Why? Did you not want it?"

"N-nein, it was fine, just unexpected", he whispered, smiling a bit. He rolled onto his side to hide the blush. Prussia took this as an invitation to sleep, but he didn't want to.

"Hey, West, I'm gonna go outside for a smoke, want one?"

"You know I hate those things."

"Just wondering. After Gott knows how many of these hook-ups we've had, you'd think you'd have caught on my habit by now." Gilbert shrugged, pulling on some sweat pants and grabbing his pack of cigarettes from the side table drawer. Ludwig rolled back around, smiling secretly as his brother left, listening to the soft _'thunk' _of the door being put back into it's frame.

Countless minutes passed as Ludwig reveled in the feel of his brother's lips against his own, ignoring the fact that his love may never be returned. After half an hour, he sat up. Prussia would normally be back in by now, smelling of sex and smoke, demanding another round. His heart split in two when he saw the note on the porch, knees scraping on the wood as he collapsed.

He was gone with Russia, and Ludwig was forgetting the feel of him already, never to tell him he loved him.

_My darling  
>My darling, who knew?<br>My darling I miss you  
>My darling, who knew? <em>

So, how was it? It's a lot more serious than I usually write, other than the smut.

Review please!


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